You kissed me first
by TaleNeverTold
Summary: Have you ever noticed that Alec always kisses Magnus first? This is the story about that time Magnus kissed Alec first...


This was one of those lazy evenings that were made for staying at home and not even trying to make a small talk. Magnus sat comfortably in an oversized sofa – or undersized if you count in Alec who was laying across it, his head on Magnus's lap, his legs resting on sofa's armrest. Magnus has already contemplated getting a new sofa – much larger than this one – but then he'd have to move around plants and other furniture and maybe some vases and… Well, ideas for redecorating were for another time… Today was one of those lazy evenings…

Magnus was flipping through his spell book trying to figure out the best way to fix that little problem that landed on his balcony today – like, literally landed in a form of hysterical pixie who was scared out of her mind and kept blabbering something about 'stupid bet with that stupid troll about that stupid tree' and so on and so forth. Not to say that it wasn't entertaining but from years of experience Magnus knew trolls to be nasty, non-cooperative low-lives and he wasn't going to let one of them to go rampant in his city! He could've gotten rid of the troll right then and there but lately the High Warlock of Brooklyn was in irritatingly good mood all the time (despite all kinds of problems that unfolded around him with yet another war storm coming up) so he was trying to play a diplomat this time and find some peaceful solutions for all parties involved. Including the tree. Thus – reading up old spells and potion recipes.

Alec, on the other hand, was completely 'off-work' and relaxed beyond belief. Sometimes he marveled at the complete abandon he'd feel here, at Magnus's loft. Here he didn't have to be an acting Head of NY Institute, a war chief, trained Shadowhunter on constant alert… any of those things really. Alec'd still remember about his responsibilities and pressing matters and bigger picture and all… but at evenings like this he'd just allowed himself to leave it all at the doorstep with his gear and his fight mode – and simply enjoy the things that were worth fighting for. Namely, Magnus. Them.

Alec took Magnus's left hand from the sofa's backrest and started playing with his rings, taking them off and trying them on himself. At the first sight, rings were smaller and weren't supposed to fit Alec – Magnus's hands were more delicate than his. But as he tried them on, Alec was surprised that rings fit him perfectly… almost as if…

\- Magnus! Are you doing that?

Alec head rolled backward to catch Magnus's eyes when they refocused away from the book and on him. The sight still caught his breath – the beauty and magic of Magnus's cat eyes. And the fact that Alec was the only one who was trusted with this view.

Cat eyes narrowed and one of Magnus's eyebrows arched in question:

\- Um… doing what, darling?

Alec raised his hand with two of Magnus's rings on his fingers, demonstrating the issue:

\- Are you fitting your rings to my hand or is it some magical rings that would fit anyone's hand?

Cat eyes sparkled with something dangerous but then cleared out and turned human. Alec knew by now that Magnus glamoured his eyes in front of him not because he wanted to hide his warlock mark but because he thought his human eyes expressed his emotions better. And this emotion of absolute warmth and tenderness was a complete counterpart to earlier spark of darkness.

\- Well, Alexander, you're both right and wrong. These ARE magic rings and made to fit the hand of the bearer. But saying that just about ANYONE can pry them off my fingers – that's a reach! Luckily for us both, you're not 'anyone'…

With that Magnus has caught Alec's hand he'd still held up and kissed his fingers with so much tenderness as if handling flower petals. Alec's heart leaped in his chest to his throat almost choking him… and he had to look away because warlock's love was too evident and too radiant to handle for him sometimes. With all his training and experience… Alec Lightwood was only learning how to be loved.

Once Magnus has lost Alec's gaze he turned back to his book. Having found the spell that might have worked for his client, the warlock went deeper in contemplation of his course of actions. His right hand, now free from turning pages duty, traveled to thick curls of his boyfriend's head on his lap. Alec's hair was thick and soft, running his fingers through it felt like a caress to Magnus's palm… sparks of blue magic flew off his fingers without Magnus's conscious thought of it… Alec was always able to emit this special kind of magic of him… Not that Magnus would ever mind…

Laying Shadowhunter hummed with pleasure over this magical massage, with the way it was dissolving the tension Alec didn't even realized he'd held in his body. His mind drifted backwards through day's events…

Morning… kissing Magnus, kissing him senseless, morphing into his firm yet pliable body, catching him pressed between Alec's tall frame and decorated wall in Magnus's study… until that wall suddenly disappeared and they'd fallen into the living room and scared the breath out of Magnus's cats. Yeah, Magnus losing control over his magic wasn't always as harmless as blue sparkles off his fingers – but Alec was still happy that he was the one bringing centuries-old warlock to the edge of oblivion!

And then midday… the meeting with Clave representatives about recent abnormal activities with fairies in the Central Park… Clave had called upon the High Warlock of Brooklyn for his diplomatic expertise… And that said warlock showed up in that deep-purple shirt that hugged his body just right… and fur tail that caressed his thigh every time he moved… and neckless that kissed Magnus's sensitive collarbones… all the things Alec wanted to do himself but was tortured with official surroundings of their meeting and people, other people, oh God!

Yet, Alec has played his part well. He was trained after all. To be emotionless. And by the looks of it, nobody had noticed a thing. Well, except for Jace who was shifting uncomfortably in his seat and hiding away from looking at Alec or Magnus… parabatai bond wasn't easy on Jace when his brother was so hot for his boyfriend…

Later Magnus has left the Institute to attend to some 'pixie issue' as he'd put it – and the day went downhill after that. The Clave representative, as it turned out, had another agenda for their arrival – they were questioning his Shadowhunters about recent events in the Institute, about which Downworlders acted as allies and which didn't… That felt like a beginning of yet another witch hunt…

By the end of the day Alec's playful mood was gone… and then was resurrected miraculously once he entered the loft.

* * *

Magnus's hand tagged a little on Alec's hair and that brought him from his reverie. Alec looked at Magnus with soft smile:

\- Yes?

Magnus's looked at his boyfriend quizzically, like he was trying to solve some mathematical problem. Not having found the solution Magnus'd said:

\- You're smiling... It's a lovely sight to behold, I'm all for it! But what'd brought it about, if I may? You came home all... 'vexed' I would say... and now you're all smiles, Alexander...

Magnus complimented his question with gentle caress of Alec's jawline and neck… Alec was sure Magnus was remembering the exact ways they'd become 'un-vexed' earlier. But he'd also remembered the reason behind his sour mood:

\- Yeah, today was tough, the Clave is storming through the Institute, looking for traitors where there's nothing to be found, giving me all kinds of hell...

Magnus wasn't as easily sidetracked and wasn't going to go back to that subject – he prompted his shadowhunter to move to the question:

\- But..?

\- Then you'd kissed me…

Alec's eyes got unfocused with that dreamy expression when one reflects on a cherished memory. Magnus almost snorted but then he'd regained his high manners and opted out for overdramatic eye roll:

\- This is hardly the first time we'd ever kissed, darling... not even the first time we'd kissed today! If I remember correctly - and I ALWAYS remember US correctly - it was VERY HARD to let you go to work when you'd kissed me red this morning!

This memory prompted Alec to get up from his laying position and straddle Magnus, pushing him into sofa cushions - but his eager boyfriend didn't seem to mind the extra weight. As Alec had attacked this gorgeous man with soft yet very hungry and urgent kisses, he kept whispering in between:

\- Well, the fault is all yours… you are very 'kissable' in the mornings, Magnus… all soft and purring... and real...

Magnus surfaced from the frenzy of Alec's kisses and asked in flirtatious tone:

\- Do I seem less real to you other times of the day?!

Alec bit down of a soft spot just a little below Magnus's ear, just about a hairline – a soft that made Magnus grunt and buckle his hips upwards to meet Alec's in the most igniting collision. Alec knew he could've stopped talking and things would progress to where they were heading much quicker… but after all the torturing he had to endure today courtesy of his magical man, Alec felt he could spare few moments of anticipation for some sweet revenge.

Alec was new to seduction as it was not a standard curriculum in shadowhunter's training and Jace could never interest him in that kind of 'hunting technics'… before. Ever since Alec came to possess this vivid, mind consuming, overpowering thirst for a certain cat-eyed man, he'd became more attentive to what people around him would find… arousing. Some of the things worked he was never willing to try (even though Izzy has had some very creative ideas that would haunt Alec for eternity), but some things worked magic on Magnus. Like Alec touching that spot behind Magnus's ear… and few more tender spots across his body… and watching Alec work out or spar… or Alec's voice. That special voice Alec had only for Magnus – deep, reach with need and promises.

And that was the weapon Alec chose to answer the half-forgotten question:

\- Yes, sure... Not real… Especially when you come on official Clave business and we discuss tactics and plans... and people nod along and shy away from looking at you, being all powerful and majestic High Warlock of Brooklyn... And all 'I' can think about is 'MY warlock!' and how much I want to press you against the wall and bury my hands in the spikes of your hair and make you shut up the best way I know how! ...

It was so liberating – to act on every desire he was holding up ever since that damn meeting! Magnus's hair sparkled under Alec's fingers as he tugged it to get a better access to that pulsing neck vein. An errand thought crossed Alec's mind 'Vampire's may be onto something… just one bite!' – as he bit and licked over the bite marks and then bit again, and again, and again…

Magnus payed back with passion – his teeth grazed around Alec's nipples, his fingers scratched lightly outlining the shapes of Alec's back runes. Magnus's couldn't see them, but he knew them by heart – Alec's skin was more tender there, more responsive to his touch. And the response was glorious!

Though it quickly became painful – not the biting but... Alec sort of complained:

\- Magnus... uhghhh... damn... my standard wardrobe does not accommodate for the effect you have on me!

Magnus went for offensive in this new game of verbal seduction:

\- Back at you, Alexander! My wardrobe is anything but 'standard'!

Magnus's face perplexed with disgust for a moment:

\- What a weird words combination - 'standard wardrobe'!

Alec laughed, his chest rose and fell catching Magnus's hungry gaze. Diva persona gave way to a wanting lover and Magnus continued his own accusation for the day:

\- And I'm also HARD PRESSED to conceal anything! I should forbid you from wearing that thigh holster, you know?! And your 'standard' black leather pants make me want to do things to you... things that wouldn't be proper on the floor of the Council room... with Council members present... oh, just don't give me that look!

Alec started back giving his best 'who? me?' expression:

\- What look? I'm all innocence and inexperience...

Magnus's fingers dug into Alec's toned back muscles, digging their way down till they'd found those two dimples… where a very tight belt of 'standard' black leather pants stopped their journey. He huffed:

\- Pft! As if! Alexander, seriously though! Taunt me like this ever again - with all the 'accidental' touches and playing with the collar of your shirt... and your fingers... and the rune on your neck... - and I'll drop you right then and there! It took centuries of practicing self-control for me to wait till home!

And there it was again – that smile! That wide, open, lost-in-happiness smile Alec spotted earlier! The smile they were discussing… kind of.

Alec voice was dreamy as he'd recalled:

\- And then you'd kissed me senseless... AGAIN!

That was not the explanation Magnus was expecting as it explained absolutely nothing! He tried prompting his Alec for further details:

\- So... that's what brought it about? You're smiling because you'd turned me into hormonal teenager with no shred of dignity when it comes to my hot boyfriend? That was the plan?

Magnus tried to sound offended at the implication. High Warlock of Brooklyn with centuries of life experiences was not supposed to cave so easily… and to whom! To a virgin shadowhunter!

Alec was happily oblivious to Magnus's moment of self-assessment because he'd suddenly stumbled into such moment himself. His voice went softer, bit unsure:

\- I'm smiling because YOU kissed me... I thought... I mean... I know you... It's not the same but...

For the first time this evening Alec took his hands off Magnus and dropped them to his laps. Magnus brought his hands to tug on Alec's neck, fixing him to face his worried eyes:

\- Alexander... Out with it!

Alec freed himself from Magnus's grab and sat straight. His confession sounded more like a proclamation of 'take it or leave it' sorts:

\- Ok! I'm happy because now I know you want me as much as I want you! And I'd made YOU kiss me first! There, Magnus, now you know!

Now it Magnus's turn to look taken aback with this statement. Confusion ran through his features. What was it? His Alexander, his fierce warrior, one of the strongest and most determined creatures he knew in four hundred years… looked lost? Even scared? And because he thought… what?

He couldn't! Alec couldn't possibly think that he was anything less than the most… Could he?

Magnus spoke – and couldn't believe the thought behind his words as they came out:

\- Oh... Oh my... You were... all this time... you were doubting your... appeal?

Alec pushed himself off Magnus's lap and stood up turning away from cat eyes that were burning with love and questions. Some things were just embarrassing to talk about – but once started Alec just couldn't stop:

\- Um... you're always... so in control of yourself... I always kissed you first... I thought... maybe...

Magnus rose from the sofa, standing behind Alec's taller frame, not touching him but letting him know he's that close. He asked again:

\- Maybe?..

Magnus question sent shivers down Alec's spine – maybe it suddenly became cold… or maybe he was just dreading to answer it. But he answered anyway:

\- Maybe I didn't turn out to be as interesting as you'd... expected...

Magnus yanked Alec's arm and spun him around to face his broken anger:

\- Alec! Of all the things you might have thought..! Why THIS?!

The hurt and disbelief in Magnus's eyes was so visible and so honest – Alec really couldn't even remember why, by the grace of the Angel, he could ever have these stupid doubts about Magnus's feelings for him. He tried shrugging it off:

\- Well...

But Magnus stopped his attempts by putting his finger to Alec's lips:

\- No! Just… no… Please, be quiet now...

Alec did as he was told, using silent moment to kiss Magnus's finger, earning a small smile from unusually silent Magnus. Seemed like his ever so eloquent magical boyfriend was lost for words.

It took Magnus a while to come up with what with what he was about to say – and it was something significant, Alec could say by the deep inhale Magnus started with… but what came out was the simplest, matter-of-fact truth none of them even had to think about:

\- Alec, you love me...

Alec nodded with heartfelt conviction:

\- I do, you know that!

Magnus smiled happier, cradling Alec's face in his palm, running his thumb across Alec's cheekbones and fighting the urge to go directly to kissing his perfect face. But Magnus still had some things to say so he'd continued:

\- Shh, I know you love me, I do! It's just that... you're the first one...

Alec raised an eyebrow in disbelief, but Magnus didn't falter:

\- Oh, don't look like that! I mean... you're the first one who knows... everything. You know of my demons... and that demons are literally my relatives... you know fully well of my immortality... my extensive past... my problematic status that does not benefit your position in the Clave in any way... yet still, through all of that, DESPITE all of that... you chose to love me... ME! Openly, unashamedly, passionately - with all you've got!

That feeling of joy, pride, happiness – it tore its way through Magnus's trembling voice, through his heaving chest – and collided him with Alec, holding him so close he could dissolve into him and would only happier for it! Alec held him closer still, a little vary of his strength yet confident his warlock didn't break so easily, especially not of happiness! He moved away just a bit to touch his forehead to Magnus's and said simply:

\- Magnus, you have to know, it wasn't a choice… I WAS trying to find my way out of feeling like this... for having feelings like this for a man... for you. But... I'm happy I failed... and fell in love... with you. I'm just hoping 'all I've got' will be enough...

Magnus opened his eyes and bright gold color of his true soul struck Alec speechless – and it happened every time he'd seen it. Alec realized that something shimmers around them and the picture of reality started to blur in his peripheral vision – but he could bring himself to look around to check if they were still on a hard ground. Even if Magnus whirled them into open sky or another dimension – which happened from time to time when Magnus was very emotional – Alec couldn't care less. In this very moment his dimension started and ended with these shining golden eyes of his shining magical boyfriend.

Magnus spoke:

\- Enough?! Don't sell yourself short, love... All you've got is my EVERYTHING! When you looked at me... touched me... kissed me... I hoped. I hoped so much it wasn't a dream! And you wouldn't dissolve if I touch you back... I was so afraid of losing you that I couldn't fully commit to having you in a first place... until...

\- Till what, Magnus? What changed?

\- You love me...

Alec made a 'pffft' noise of small irritation – they were circling around completely obvious fact:

\- Again, established that...

Magnus could see how 'you love me' wasn't quite an explanation Alec was looking for, he simply didn't get it. Because he didn't have to look for THIS kind of love for as long as Magnus did. Because he didn't know how it was so very different from what Magnus ever had before!

\- Nephilim children don't just 'love'. I've seen it up close times and times again but never in ALL MY YEARS I thought I can have it for myself. That kind of LOVE!

Did Magnus mean that Alec's feelings for him were too much to handle? Alec's voice became apprehensive for a moment:

\- You know I can't take it back, right? Now you've got my love whether you want it or not...

Magnus's irises narrowed to thin black slits – his equivalent of squinting – and he hissed:

\- Weird moment to joke like that, Alec, we'll have to work on your social skills later... Because... want it? Seriously?

Alec chuckled – his boyfriend was very cat-like and drew his claws just as quickly as retracted them. In a split-second Magnus was back to his soulful explanation:

\- I never KNEW that your love was even IN THE REALM OF POSSIBILITIES for me to have! And now... I have it... And I can touch you, and kiss you, and hold you... and have you for myself. And it's such a freedom I never knew before... If I ever become too much for you, or scare you or anger you... and you will turn away...

\- But...

\- No, it's all right. This possibility does not frighten me anymore. Because you love me. And your love will fight its way back to me, the same way I will fight my way back to you. And... this is the first time ever... in all of my lifetime... when I believe in the word 'forever'. With you. It's so...

Alec suggested:

\- Freeing?

Magnus nodded:

\- Yes, freeing, that's the word. Your love made me free to love you back. And to kiss you first, if that's what made you smile.

Magnus kissed Alec – softly first but then kiss grew deeper, stronger, sending them both into the realm of what they were to each other – everything. Alec felt dizzy, like he was drunk on something very potent, yet he felt very present and aware of NOW and HERE. And Alec wanted MORE! He REALLY tried asking Magnus to magic away his shirt with elaborate strips and clasps because Alec, with all his Shadowhunter skills and additional Dexterity rune, couldn't manage this fashion trap! Yet every time he tried catching his breath or saying something Magnus would catch his mouth with his, swallowing away Alec's moans and ability to think coherently. The only thing Alec did manage to say was:

\- From now on it will ALWAYS make me smile! I'm your first 'forever'!

And somewhere between a waterfall of kisses and feverish touches and ripping that damn shirt off (Magnus's should've magic it away! Now he'll have to magic it back together!) and biting on Magnus's nipple and licking his abdomen and going lower and lower and… Somewhere in between all that glorious mess Alec thought he'd heard Magnus exhale:

\- You are my first so many things, Alec Lightwood...


End file.
